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Q: Talk about why you and your wife started the Higher Bond dating app.
A: My wife and I actually met on a dating app! During our first date, we talked about just how terrible the online dating experience was for each of us. That experience, coupled with working in the dating industry for years, led me to see the realities of the dating app options available for Christians. Unfortunately, most “Christian” dating apps aren’t very Christian at all. They’re simply spun versions of popular worldly dating apps with the name of Christ stamped in their branding. These apps promote worldly views on dating, allow inappropriate content, and fail to provide a safe environment for Christian singles. Sadly, this should be expected as they’re not Christian-owned or rooted in faith, yet they have a massive impact on the faith community. One Sunday, our pastor was talking about the degradation of the family unit and the negative effects it was having on the Christian community. It was then that God put it on my heart that we needed to do something to provide a safe and effective way for Christians to better connect romantically. I felt that this was a way to bring about real change with the potential for a generational impact. I shared this with my wife, we prayed about it for a while, and eventually put our “yes” on the table.
Q: What are some issues that parents need to know about dating apps?
A: I could probably talk about this for days, but I’ll do my best to be as brief as possible. First, most Christian dating apps are secularly owned, are filled with inappropriate content, and have absolutely no concern for Biblical principles. Secondly, many Christian dating apps have adopted swipe technology, which can have a huge negative effect on someone’s mental health. Thirdly, online dating can be safe, but only when two things are true. One—you’re using a dating app that takes a proactive approach to safety and security, which most don’t do in the name of higher profits. Two—you have to be educated about the most common dangers, scams, etc. Many of the horror stories you hear about online dating are easily avoidable with education, but the resources just aren’t available.
Q: You have a website that offers free resources for Christian singles as well as church leaders and singles ministries. What does that include?
A: As millions of Christian singles turn to online dating each year, we feel it’s important for church leaders, pastors, and singles group leaders to be prepared to support and educate those who choose this path. Our goal is to bridge the knowledge gap to empower and equip church leaders to better serve the singles in their congregations. We have resources on several topics including the hidden dangers of online dating for Christians, real world examples of what Christians have encountered when online dating, the mental effects of swipe-based matchmaking, the link between technology addiction and online dating, terminology and buzzwords to know, and practical ways to support singles who choose to date online. All the resources can be accessed free at: https://thestateofdating.com/.
A: My wife and I actually met on a dating app! During our first date, we talked about just how terrible the online dating experience was for each of us. That experience, coupled with working in the dating industry for years, led me to see the realities of the dating app options available for Christians. Unfortunately, most “Christian” dating apps aren’t very Christian at all. They’re simply spun versions of popular worldly dating apps with the name of Christ stamped in their branding. These apps promote worldly views on dating, allow inappropriate content, and fail to provide a safe environment for Christian singles. Sadly, this should be expected as they’re not Christian-owned or rooted in faith, yet they have a massive impact on the faith community. One Sunday, our pastor was talking about the degradation of the family unit and the negative effects it was having on the Christian community. It was then that God put it on my heart that we needed to do something to provide a safe and effective way for Christians to better connect romantically. I felt that this was a way to bring about real change with the potential for a generational impact. I shared this with my wife, we prayed about it for a while, and eventually put our “yes” on the table.
Q: What are some issues that parents need to know about dating apps?
A: I could probably talk about this for days, but I’ll do my best to be as brief as possible. First, most Christian dating apps are secularly owned, are filled with inappropriate content, and have absolutely no concern for Biblical principles. Secondly, many Christian dating apps have adopted swipe technology, which can have a huge negative effect on someone’s mental health. Thirdly, online dating can be safe, but only when two things are true. One—you’re using a dating app that takes a proactive approach to safety and security, which most don’t do in the name of higher profits. Two—you have to be educated about the most common dangers, scams, etc. Many of the horror stories you hear about online dating are easily avoidable with education, but the resources just aren’t available.
Q: You have a website that offers free resources for Christian singles as well as church leaders and singles ministries. What does that include?
A: As millions of Christian singles turn to online dating each year, we feel it’s important for church leaders, pastors, and singles group leaders to be prepared to support and educate those who choose this path. Our goal is to bridge the knowledge gap to empower and equip church leaders to better serve the singles in their congregations. We have resources on several topics including the hidden dangers of online dating for Christians, real world examples of what Christians have encountered when online dating, the mental effects of swipe-based matchmaking, the link between technology addiction and online dating, terminology and buzzwords to know, and practical ways to support singles who choose to date online. All the resources can be accessed free at: https://thestateofdating.com/.
Q: You specifically didn’t put a swiping feature on your app. Why?
A: There is a lot of research showing that swipe dating is causing serious mental health problems for singles. On average, users scroll through profiles 20 hours per week which builds an addictive dopamine loop much like drugs, alcohol, and gambling addictions do. People join these apps and start swiping. When they get their first match, it fires a high-level dopamine rush to the brain. From there, people keep swiping to chase that high, but there are a lot of reasons they’ll never achieve that same feeling. The problem is so bad that people are even experiencing withdrawal symptoms such as twitchy fingers when they don’t use the apps.
Q: Besides no swiping, what additional ways does your dating app differ from other faith-based dating apps?
A: Higher Bond is 100% Christian owned, built on Biblical principles, and matches singles based on their faith and lifestyle choices. Safety is a top priority with every single member’s profile manually reviewed and approved by our team. Additionally, all photos are manually reviewed by our team, and we take a hardline stance on modesty with photos (no scantily clad photos, no shirt off photos, no bikini photos, no excessive cleavage, etc.). New members answer 35 questions about their faith, lifestyle, and relationship goals, which helps our team provide 3-5 curated matches daily. These are questions like “How important is prayer to you?” “Do you believe in traditional gender roles within the household?” “Do you watch R-rated movies or shows?” From these matches, members are able to select only one new person per day they can start a new conversation with. It’s all about quality over quantity. Additionally, we offer guided first messages where the first message you send is four questions you answer to help you get through one of the toughest parts of online dating which is starting a conversation. Lastly, we are adding new educational features to support single Christians which include daily devotionals for singles, educational seminars, and what we’re calling “Dating School” which is a collection of articles, videos, sermons, etc. to help educate singles on Godly dating and courtship as well as the world of online dating.
Q: You have run into some discriminatory issues trying to run ads for Higher Bond on mainstream media and social media. Talk about that.
A: Obviously one of the most important aspects of starting an app like Higher Bond is getting the word out. Our original plan was to use a lot of mainstream social media platforms, but that was an absolute nightmare. Facebook rejected our ads and would not even give us a reason as to why or even the right to appeal as they do with other companies. Additionally, in January of 2022, Facebook removed the ability to run ads to people based on their religion. The most interesting refusal we got was from Reddit. Upon asking for further explanation, they sent us back a screenshot of our website with the phrases “online dating for Christian singles” and “a dating app designed intentionally for Christian men and Christian women” highlighted and email text that said: “However, we do see the following on your website: Unfortunately, we will not be able to approve the ads here.” This has hampered our ability to promote our app and it feels like it’s because we are a Christian-based company.
Q: How do you see dating apps evolving in the next few years?
A: The use of dating apps is going to continue to grow. The data supports this, and I think it makes complete sense with the direction society is going. I expect us to see most dating apps shifting to the swipe-based models, if they haven’t already. There’s one major dating company currently buying up huge chunks of the market and converting them to swipe apps because it’s way more profitable.
A: There is a lot of research showing that swipe dating is causing serious mental health problems for singles. On average, users scroll through profiles 20 hours per week which builds an addictive dopamine loop much like drugs, alcohol, and gambling addictions do. People join these apps and start swiping. When they get their first match, it fires a high-level dopamine rush to the brain. From there, people keep swiping to chase that high, but there are a lot of reasons they’ll never achieve that same feeling. The problem is so bad that people are even experiencing withdrawal symptoms such as twitchy fingers when they don’t use the apps.
Q: Besides no swiping, what additional ways does your dating app differ from other faith-based dating apps?
A: Higher Bond is 100% Christian owned, built on Biblical principles, and matches singles based on their faith and lifestyle choices. Safety is a top priority with every single member’s profile manually reviewed and approved by our team. Additionally, all photos are manually reviewed by our team, and we take a hardline stance on modesty with photos (no scantily clad photos, no shirt off photos, no bikini photos, no excessive cleavage, etc.). New members answer 35 questions about their faith, lifestyle, and relationship goals, which helps our team provide 3-5 curated matches daily. These are questions like “How important is prayer to you?” “Do you believe in traditional gender roles within the household?” “Do you watch R-rated movies or shows?” From these matches, members are able to select only one new person per day they can start a new conversation with. It’s all about quality over quantity. Additionally, we offer guided first messages where the first message you send is four questions you answer to help you get through one of the toughest parts of online dating which is starting a conversation. Lastly, we are adding new educational features to support single Christians which include daily devotionals for singles, educational seminars, and what we’re calling “Dating School” which is a collection of articles, videos, sermons, etc. to help educate singles on Godly dating and courtship as well as the world of online dating.
Q: You have run into some discriminatory issues trying to run ads for Higher Bond on mainstream media and social media. Talk about that.
A: Obviously one of the most important aspects of starting an app like Higher Bond is getting the word out. Our original plan was to use a lot of mainstream social media platforms, but that was an absolute nightmare. Facebook rejected our ads and would not even give us a reason as to why or even the right to appeal as they do with other companies. Additionally, in January of 2022, Facebook removed the ability to run ads to people based on their religion. The most interesting refusal we got was from Reddit. Upon asking for further explanation, they sent us back a screenshot of our website with the phrases “online dating for Christian singles” and “a dating app designed intentionally for Christian men and Christian women” highlighted and email text that said: “However, we do see the following on your website: Unfortunately, we will not be able to approve the ads here.” This has hampered our ability to promote our app and it feels like it’s because we are a Christian-based company.
Q: How do you see dating apps evolving in the next few years?
A: The use of dating apps is going to continue to grow. The data supports this, and I think it makes complete sense with the direction society is going. I expect us to see most dating apps shifting to the swipe-based models, if they haven’t already. There’s one major dating company currently buying up huge chunks of the market and converting them to swipe apps because it’s way more profitable.
About Jason Lee:
Jason Lee worked in both the Christian and mainstream online dating industries for over eight years in the areas of customer acquisition, marketing, and consulting. He graduated from the University of Florida with a degree in Business Management and served as an armor officer in the Army National Guard for five years, receiving the rank of 1st Lieutenant. He and his wife have a 9-month-old daughter and make their home in Las Vegas, Nevada. Visit https://higherbond.com.
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