Q&A with Author Ellen Fannon

Q: What inspired the story for your novel, "Save the Date"?
A: I got the idea for “Save the Date” from a post on a “Classmates” website. The post started me wondering how some of the people in my class turned out, and set me on a journey of “what if?” Like the protagonist, Hannah Jensen in “Save the Date,” I moved away from my hometown over 40 years ago and have pretty much lost touch with everyone from my high school years.
Q: What is the Christian message in the book?
A: There is more than one Christian message, but the main message is the faith journey of a young girl, Hannah Jensen, who truly believes she is a Christian because she is a good person and goes to church. As a teenager, she is challenged with the Truth and must come to terms with what she has believed her whole life versus what she is learning in a different church (one she is only attending to please her boyfriend’s mother). One large stumbling block on her road to faith is another girl, Shelli Delgado, who attends that church. Shelli claims to be a Christian but doesn’t act like one. In fact, she has bullied Hannah for several years and made her life miserable. Because of Shelli’s hypocrisy, Hannah wrestles with what true faith looks like. She eventually must come to understand that her personal relationship with Jesus as her Savior must not be allowed to be influenced by other people’s actions.
Q: How can non-Christians relate to the story?
A: “Save the Date” is humorous, entertaining, and very relatable to anyone contemplating attending a high school reunion. While hoping to reconnect with an old boyfriend, Hannah is, at the same time, apprehensive about running into old nemeses and reopening old wounds. As a widow raising a teenager, Hannah has a lot of issues to deal with, including well-meaning people who want to “fix her up,” eccentric family members, typical teenage drama with her daughter, and reminiscing about her own teenage years. Although not a typical love story, there are romantic elements in Hannah’s relationship with her high school sweetheart and, later, with her husband. Although humorous, there are deep, heart-wrenching emotional insights as well, such as grieving the loss of a spouse, the lasting impact of the actions of people who hurt her long ago, and the effect that Christian hypocrisy can have on non-believers.
Q: You wrote a fictional book entitled "Other People's Children" about fostering, but was it really more of a memoir? Why or why not?
A: There are definitely some portions of “Other People’s Children” that are true stories. (I’m not telling which!) Other parts are heavily fictionalized, or a combination of characters into a “composite child,” partially based on real children we fostered.
A: I got the idea for “Save the Date” from a post on a “Classmates” website. The post started me wondering how some of the people in my class turned out, and set me on a journey of “what if?” Like the protagonist, Hannah Jensen in “Save the Date,” I moved away from my hometown over 40 years ago and have pretty much lost touch with everyone from my high school years.
Q: What is the Christian message in the book?
A: There is more than one Christian message, but the main message is the faith journey of a young girl, Hannah Jensen, who truly believes she is a Christian because she is a good person and goes to church. As a teenager, she is challenged with the Truth and must come to terms with what she has believed her whole life versus what she is learning in a different church (one she is only attending to please her boyfriend’s mother). One large stumbling block on her road to faith is another girl, Shelli Delgado, who attends that church. Shelli claims to be a Christian but doesn’t act like one. In fact, she has bullied Hannah for several years and made her life miserable. Because of Shelli’s hypocrisy, Hannah wrestles with what true faith looks like. She eventually must come to understand that her personal relationship with Jesus as her Savior must not be allowed to be influenced by other people’s actions.
Q: How can non-Christians relate to the story?
A: “Save the Date” is humorous, entertaining, and very relatable to anyone contemplating attending a high school reunion. While hoping to reconnect with an old boyfriend, Hannah is, at the same time, apprehensive about running into old nemeses and reopening old wounds. As a widow raising a teenager, Hannah has a lot of issues to deal with, including well-meaning people who want to “fix her up,” eccentric family members, typical teenage drama with her daughter, and reminiscing about her own teenage years. Although not a typical love story, there are romantic elements in Hannah’s relationship with her high school sweetheart and, later, with her husband. Although humorous, there are deep, heart-wrenching emotional insights as well, such as grieving the loss of a spouse, the lasting impact of the actions of people who hurt her long ago, and the effect that Christian hypocrisy can have on non-believers.
Q: You wrote a fictional book entitled "Other People's Children" about fostering, but was it really more of a memoir? Why or why not?
A: There are definitely some portions of “Other People’s Children” that are true stories. (I’m not telling which!) Other parts are heavily fictionalized, or a combination of characters into a “composite child,” partially based on real children we fostered.

Q: You have personally fostered over 40 children. What do you believe people who are considering foster parenting should know?
A: Foster parenting can be one of the most rewarding, while, at the same time, one of the most difficult jobs you will ever do. It is not a job for the faint-hearted! I don’t think people realize what all is involved. First, there are several hours of training, background checks, letters of reference, and home inspections before one can be licensed for foster care. The paperwork is endless. Once licensed, foster parents are required to renew their license every year—which involves filling out more paperwork, more letters of reference, more home inspections, and more continuing education. Foster parents need to be flexible because their schedules will constantly be rearranged to accommodate children’s visits with their biological families, caseworker and guardian ad litem home visits, mandated doctor appointments and other child assessments. Many people are under the mistaken impression that foster parents make money from the stipends paid for fostering. If anything, they are lucky to break even. Foster care stipends don’t cover the entire costs of most daycares, and out-of-pocket expenses for school fees, field trips, extra-curricular activities, birthday and Christmas presents, and babysitting. If the child is sick, foster parents may have to take unpaid time from work and lose income.
I went into foster parenting completely naïve and altruistic, and I don’t want other people going into this venture blindly, as I did. No amount of training can prepare you for the reality of foster parenting. Be prepared to have your heart broken. Be prepared to be content with never knowing what happened to the children you fell in love with once they leave your home. Be prepared to not have a say in the welfare of the children you have taken in, cared for, and loved, because the “system” knows best. Be prepared to fight for those children, regardless, because you may be the only advocate your foster children have. Be prepared to open your home and your heart; and be prepared to love, laugh, and make cherished memories, as this will be the most rewarding job you will ever do.
Q: That sounds like an honest assessment, but yet you kept doing it. Why?
A: We continued to do foster care despite the difficulties because that’s what we felt God calling us to do. There was (and is) a tremendous need for foster homes and we were a highly sought-after home for placements. We were blessed to be able to work under the umbrella of The Florida Baptist Children’s Home, which gave us a layer of bureaucracy (in this case, a positive situation) between us and the Department of Children and Families. I can’t say enough nice things about the people at Florida Baptist. For the most part, the individual case workers were wonderful, just overworked. And, of course, the main reason we continued as foster parents was because we loved the children and wanted to make a difference in their lives for whatever time we had them.
Q: If you could do three things today to make the foster parenting system in the U.S. better for kids and parents, what would they be?
A: First, we need better support for foster parents. So many times, children are simply “dumped” into willing homes and when the foster parents have problems or need help, they are ignored, or the issues are not handled in a timely manner. Foster parents are also heavily scrutinized (which is understandable), but it is to the point that everything they do or fail to do is under suspicion. There is always that little cloud of fear hanging over foster parents that there will be false accusations or something may happen with a child in their care that is beyond their control. The stereotype of the abusive, neglectful, or money-seeking foster parent is further perpetrated by the media as foster parents are often depicted negatively in movies, books, etc. Most foster parents are just trying to do the right thing and make a difference in the lives of children who have been victims of circumstances beyond their control.
Secondly, the system is woefully under-staffed, and the employees are overworked and underpaid. Turnover and burnout are high. There are not enough case workers and child advocates to ensure each child’s best interest. This is where foster parent input could be invaluable, but unfortunately, the departments of child welfare and the courts give very little (if any) credibility to the people who live with, care for, and love these children. In most cases, the people making life-changing decisions for these children have never even seen them, let alone know what’s best for them. So many children fall through the cracks because of poor communication, failure of the system to do a thorough job, overworked employees, or simply poor laws.
Thirdly, there need to be major overhauls in the laws that continue to return children to dysfunctional biological families and dangerous home environments. Keeping biological families together at all costs is not always a good thing. We saw this many times in our limited experience. Several children who were returned to biological parents were removed from the home again and again, yet the courts repeatedly gave these parents chance after chance. The cycle just goes on and on, and children growing up in these homes become dysfunctional parents themselves. The “system” has also become more and more politically correct and more openly hostile to Christian influence over the years. Unfortunately, this mindset will negatively impact any well-meaning social program.
A: Foster parenting can be one of the most rewarding, while, at the same time, one of the most difficult jobs you will ever do. It is not a job for the faint-hearted! I don’t think people realize what all is involved. First, there are several hours of training, background checks, letters of reference, and home inspections before one can be licensed for foster care. The paperwork is endless. Once licensed, foster parents are required to renew their license every year—which involves filling out more paperwork, more letters of reference, more home inspections, and more continuing education. Foster parents need to be flexible because their schedules will constantly be rearranged to accommodate children’s visits with their biological families, caseworker and guardian ad litem home visits, mandated doctor appointments and other child assessments. Many people are under the mistaken impression that foster parents make money from the stipends paid for fostering. If anything, they are lucky to break even. Foster care stipends don’t cover the entire costs of most daycares, and out-of-pocket expenses for school fees, field trips, extra-curricular activities, birthday and Christmas presents, and babysitting. If the child is sick, foster parents may have to take unpaid time from work and lose income.
I went into foster parenting completely naïve and altruistic, and I don’t want other people going into this venture blindly, as I did. No amount of training can prepare you for the reality of foster parenting. Be prepared to have your heart broken. Be prepared to be content with never knowing what happened to the children you fell in love with once they leave your home. Be prepared to not have a say in the welfare of the children you have taken in, cared for, and loved, because the “system” knows best. Be prepared to fight for those children, regardless, because you may be the only advocate your foster children have. Be prepared to open your home and your heart; and be prepared to love, laugh, and make cherished memories, as this will be the most rewarding job you will ever do.
Q: That sounds like an honest assessment, but yet you kept doing it. Why?
A: We continued to do foster care despite the difficulties because that’s what we felt God calling us to do. There was (and is) a tremendous need for foster homes and we were a highly sought-after home for placements. We were blessed to be able to work under the umbrella of The Florida Baptist Children’s Home, which gave us a layer of bureaucracy (in this case, a positive situation) between us and the Department of Children and Families. I can’t say enough nice things about the people at Florida Baptist. For the most part, the individual case workers were wonderful, just overworked. And, of course, the main reason we continued as foster parents was because we loved the children and wanted to make a difference in their lives for whatever time we had them.
Q: If you could do three things today to make the foster parenting system in the U.S. better for kids and parents, what would they be?
A: First, we need better support for foster parents. So many times, children are simply “dumped” into willing homes and when the foster parents have problems or need help, they are ignored, or the issues are not handled in a timely manner. Foster parents are also heavily scrutinized (which is understandable), but it is to the point that everything they do or fail to do is under suspicion. There is always that little cloud of fear hanging over foster parents that there will be false accusations or something may happen with a child in their care that is beyond their control. The stereotype of the abusive, neglectful, or money-seeking foster parent is further perpetrated by the media as foster parents are often depicted negatively in movies, books, etc. Most foster parents are just trying to do the right thing and make a difference in the lives of children who have been victims of circumstances beyond their control.
Secondly, the system is woefully under-staffed, and the employees are overworked and underpaid. Turnover and burnout are high. There are not enough case workers and child advocates to ensure each child’s best interest. This is where foster parent input could be invaluable, but unfortunately, the departments of child welfare and the courts give very little (if any) credibility to the people who live with, care for, and love these children. In most cases, the people making life-changing decisions for these children have never even seen them, let alone know what’s best for them. So many children fall through the cracks because of poor communication, failure of the system to do a thorough job, overworked employees, or simply poor laws.
Thirdly, there need to be major overhauls in the laws that continue to return children to dysfunctional biological families and dangerous home environments. Keeping biological families together at all costs is not always a good thing. We saw this many times in our limited experience. Several children who were returned to biological parents were removed from the home again and again, yet the courts repeatedly gave these parents chance after chance. The cycle just goes on and on, and children growing up in these homes become dysfunctional parents themselves. The “system” has also become more and more politically correct and more openly hostile to Christian influence over the years. Unfortunately, this mindset will negatively impact any well-meaning social program.
About Ellen Fannon:
Award-winning author Ellen Fannon is a practicing veterinarian, former missionary, and church pianist/organist. She originated and wrote the Pet Peeves column for the Northwest Florida Daily News before taking a two-year assignment with the Southern Baptist International Mission Board. She and her retired Air Force pilot-turned-pastor husband have been foster parents to more than 40 children, and the adoptive parents of two sons. Her first novel, "Other People’s Children, " is a humorous account of the life of a foster parent. She is a regular contributing author for One Christian Voice, and her stories have been published in the Chicken Soup for the Soul series as well as Lifeway’s Open Windows devotional booklets, among many other publications. Her third novel about a veterinarian entitled "Don’t Bite the Doctor" will be released in 2021. She lives in Valparaiso, Florida, with her husband, sons, and assorted pets. Visit www.ellenfannonauthor.com for more information.
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